See Me at The Fool’s Festival – March 24th in Santa Ana, CA

Join me at the Fool’s Festival and get a reading from me or one of the other “Gypsy” Readers at the show.  A unique night out with the Cirqs, Freaks,  Jesters and Gypsies, step into their world, with tricks, treats, and fortunes for all.  Music, food, drinks, vendors and a world of performers to delight your senses.

 For more information, or to purchase tickets in advance, go to the website Www.thefoolsfestival.com

MaryAtFoolsFestivalThe Great “Queen Scott” Mary Stuart will be joining us at the Fool’s Festival, gracing us with her presence and telling fortunes for all!
To save and guarantee a reading, reserve now on our website! Www.thefoolsfestival.com

 

Gaining Personal Power

We have all met those people who just seem to exude personal power.  That sense of control and confident, ethical grounding that is worn like a well-tailored garment… even more, worn as their skin.  I have students who often ask me what one does to get that, where does that come from?  In truth, we all have that ability.  We are all endowed with personal power, but most of us are not trained in how to nurture it, sustain it, and be comfortable with it.  We [especially women] are taught from an early age that standing in our own power is “bossy” or “unladylike,” or that we are ‘just children’ and not powerful.  No one can grant personal power to you, nor can anyone take it away. 

We can reclaim and rebuild it.  It starts with doing what we say we will do – and not doing what we say we won’t do.  Start by showing up.  If you consistently agree to do something, but flake out at the last minute, or just don’t show up – no one is taking your power, you are throwing it away yourself.  Personal power – it’s always giving more than was required. It’s holding yourself accountable for everything you do and everything you say.

Remember, you are a mere mortal and sometimes you won’t succeed, or do your best, or you might say something you regret.  Don’t beat yourself up for not being perfect, but always hold yourself accountable and when things go wrong, look at your part and see where you can improve next time.  If you have hurt someone’s feelings, whether you meant to or not, apologize and be more aware next time.  If you didn’t meet a deadline that you agreed to, apologize and be sure to hold up your end the next time.

Now, apologizing doesn’t give you a pass to continue bad behavior.  We all have a friend who is flaky and is consistently apologizing and taking ‘full credit’ for the poor outcome, and yet they never change the poor behavior.  Don’t be sorry – be different.  Otherwise, an apology has no worth. 

Personal Power comes from being mindful of your words, your actions, your agreements, and – of course – your own power to control yourself and your actions.  Live your life in a way that if somebody said something bad about you, no one would believe it. 

 

Which comes first – Determination or Commitment?

Determination

So a huge part of dealing with your Shadow-Self is learning to recognize when it is present and stopping you from progress.  The additional part is more about how to dance with Shadow and move it out of your way, step over it, or otherwise get past it. 

Our Shadow-Self was born out of our sense of survival from our experiences and cultural influences – those negative voices in our head – put there by family, teachers, and friends, television and movies.  By the way they spoke to us, what they expected of us, and how they related their own fears into our lives. So getting past them can present some challenges.  Recognizing shadow is the first step and sometimes that is all it takes to move forward.  But other times we recognize it, but still need some tricks to get moving.

So knowing what the things are that motivate us becomes very necessary.  For me, determination is always a factor.  I have a determined nature so I don’t quit looking until I figure out what will make me move when I’m hesitating.  I also know that I have a strong will to make good on my commitments.  So I think commitment will work this time. 

So, I made commitments (filled out forms and paid fees) to have a booth at Long Beach WomanSpirit Summer Solstice Fair on June 11th at the Universalist Unitarian Church in Long Beach, CA.  Now, for me, that means I have to show up.  And, once I’ve shown up, then I will do readings at a discounted ‘special’ price in my booth.  I committed myself with the forms and fees and so now I’m moving forward with publicity.  On my way again… I’ve got some more forms to fill out and fees to pay so that my commitments keep showing up on my calendar and moving me forward.

You can’t make the same mistake twice. The second time it’s not a mistake, it’s a choice.

Fear

Oh yeah, the Shadow-Self. The one that likes to show up anytime we want to try something new, distracting us in an attempt to keep us in the comfort zone.

I managed to get my blog site set up and danced around the Shadow-Self in order to write and post my first blog page.  Yippee! good for me.  I beat the voices of fear and self-doubt, the insecurity.  I’m on my way, I have arrived… or have I? 

If you haven’t read my blog yet, it’s probably because I haven’t really let anyone know about it.  Stalling on my plan again, this time on my social media strategy.  There’s that pesky Shadow again; slowing down my progress and sabotaging my new venture.  But how to know if it was Shadow?  There were no panicky questions, no self-doubt whispering in my head like last time.  I thought I had taken care of that shadow, but apparently not.  Shadow doesn’t always show up in the same way.  The self-doubt and negative self-talk is often the easiest version to recognize.  But procrastination – especially the kind that morphs into total inaction, is another way the Shadow expresses itself.  Just another way to prevent change or progress; just put it off until it loses energy, loses life, and its positive benefits die.

So, once again, it’s time to shine the light on that Shadow-Self.  That’s the thing about Shadow, it doesn’t stay gone forever.  Sometimes it will stay away for a long time, and other times it will come out three times a day – or more.  My Shadow-Self wants to maintain the status quo and I want to expand.   It’s a tug-of-war, but I expect to win.  I just have to keep an eye out for those things inside me that want to stop my progress.  Recognize them, keep forcing them back into the light, and keep moving forward.  

So forward with my social media strategy and, hopefully, you will be able to find my blog.

 

Everything starts with a first step

This seemed like a great quote with which to start my blog.  Several of my friends and associates keep telling me I should “blog” so here goes….

The first step, for me, was make a list about the mechanics and logistics of doing a blog. I had taken a first step.  And miraculously the next step revealed itself as information just came my way.  Get a domain/site name… www.IntuitiveLifeHealer.com and learn some basics about wordpress.  So far so good.  Step 3 was to create the look and basic pages – About, FAQs, etc.  Step 4 – POST THE FIRST BLOG!  and things just got real.

Paralysis.  Oh No, this is stepping out of my comfort zone… What would I blog about?  What if nobody reads my blog – or, OMG, what if everyone reads my blog?  How will that work?  What will they expect?  Can I do this? What was I thinking? What if I fail and disappoint them? And then, finally – Who is this in my head asking all these panicky questions?  Well that was the first of those crazy questions I needed to answer.

Oh, I know who that is.  That’s my Shadow-Self, my insecurity, my self-doubt, my fear, my scared child.  These aren’t really bad questions, they are just very unproductive questions.  That pesky Shadow-Self likes to show up anytime we step out of our comfort zone and try something new.   They distract us in an attempt to keep us in the comfort zone, to assure us the status quo is enough.

So I built great momentum from that first step, only to stall in front of the Shadow-Self.  So where to go from here?  Well, everything starts with the first step…